Need some advice:
My sister who turned 50 last week invited me and my husband to her party. We did not go because there was going to be alcohol served. Neither one can be around t because it is too tempting to give in. Now I am feeling really really guilty for not showing up. I feel she is mad at me because she will not return my phone calls or talk to me via face book. I have been agonizing over this and making myself crazy. The guilt s so bad I cannot stand it. She and I are so close and I feel like I let her down and hurt her. I have been praying for comfort but none has been given. What to do oh what to do. I love my sisters so much and would do nothing to hurt them. All this because of alcohol that I would not drink. Should I have gone anyway and take a chance on backsliding or just abstain and have my family mad at me.
Does your sister know that you have an issue with alcohol? Did you let her know that you weren't going to attend? Did you get her a present and/or a card?
You probably should have gone and then left early to avoid the alcohol. I'd send a card or letter of apology and, if you can afford it, treat her to lunch or dinner as a way to make it up to her. It often doesn't take much to drive a wedge between siblings, but, it also often doesn't take much to repair the damage.
aknan
May 24, 2016
Mamag15, you absolutely did the right thing. If alcohol is that much of a temptation, it would have been a disaster to go. You wouldn't have enjoyed the occasion and what if you'd taken a drink? Your behavior could have ruined the entire party if you'd backslid.
Your sister loves you - call and tell her (leave a message if necessary) how sorry you were to have missed all the fun, but you hope she understands how you are unable to handle even being around alcohol. Say again that you love her and hope to see her soon.
You have a hard path to travel, but Gold holds you in His hands.
jdoty
May 24, 2016
If you and your sister are close, then she knows that alcohol is a problem for you, and it was thoughtless of her to invite you to a cocktail party. You have made the first move towards reconciliation, and the next move belongs to her. You have done all that can reasonably be expected of you and have no reason to reproach yourself. All you can do now is keep an open heart.
sunsetsky
May 24, 2016
Hi Mamag15. Sorry about this situation. What is done is done and can't be changed. If it would have been too much of a temptation then you were right in not going. Keep reaching out to her and try to have her for a late birthday get together with you and your husband. Maybe she is feeling a bit guilty about it too. She might feel angry now, but time does heal. Don't give up and don't keep agonizing about the past.
pixipixil
May 24, 2016
You could throw her a second, non- alcoholic surprise party.
mamag15
May 25, 2016
I went to my sister's last night and told her about the guilt feelings I had been having. She was completely understanding. She said I gave her the best give ever when I saw her on her birthday and gave her a big sisterly love and told her how much she meant to me. She said that was the best gift ever. Diane also said it was cold that day and they had her party outside. She was not happy with the whole thing anyway. She wanted a black and white theme to go with turning 50 but that never happened. It more about the younger people than her. I am glad I talked to her because I now no longer have those guilt feelings. Thank you all for helping me through this. I have really good friends on here.
Diane and I are like peas and carrots, according to Forest Gump. She told everything is okay and not to worry. She is an awesome sister.
sunsetsky
May 25, 2016
I am glad that everything worked out for you and your sister!! Thank you for letting us know.
pixipixil
May 26, 2016
She sounds awesome, mamag. I am happy for you both because your awesome sister also has an awesome sister.
mamag15
May 26, 2016
Thank you :)
aknan
May 26, 2016
Isn't it amazing how we can get ourselves worked up over a situation and afraid to talk to those involved? So many times, all it takes is a simple word to assuage the guilt. I'm glad everything is OK. Hugs to you and your sister.
You have been missed, too, aussie. Glad you are back.
Motherbrown
May 24, 2016
I don't often write on here but I always read and enjoy your comments and quotes. Missed you and am glad you are okay.
aknan
May 24, 2016
Hope you can stay connected, aussie! Hugs back.
momstoy
May 24, 2016
Glad to see you back!! Was worried when didn't see you for several days. Hugs to you too!
mamag15
May 24, 2016
Glad to see you back. We were wondering what happened to you. Pixi did a great job of using quotes in your absence.
dbnc2
May 24, 2016
These computers cam be so aggravating sometimes
a good puzzle today
trynfindit
May 24, 2016
Technology is great...when it works!
Glad to see you back.
LilyBug2014
May 24, 2016
Happy to see you are back and okay. I, along with others I see, were worried about you. Good luck with your internet issues.
nlbuchanan
May 24, 2016
Aussie, you were gone so long I was about to leave this site. I was sure you were in the hospital like last time and we would just never hear from you again. My heart was breaking and it hurts so much I'm not sure I want to continue being so vulnerable. God bless you,
aussiesapphire
May 26, 2016
Hi all, still having major problems with this new National Broadband Network, as are many others who have signed on for it. I have my phone back on but the internet is very intermittent. There is someone coming from the NBN tomorrow and hopefully they will get it sorted out. Have missed all of you very much. And as Arnie says "I'll be back" lol. God bless all of you and many hugs.
My sister who turned 50 last week invited me and my husband to her party. We did not go because there was going to be alcohol served. Neither one can be around t because it is too tempting to give in. Now I am feeling really really guilty for not showing up. I feel she is mad at me because she will not return my phone calls or talk to me via face book. I have been agonizing over this and making myself crazy. The guilt s so bad I cannot stand it. She and I are so close and I feel like I let her down and hurt her. I have been praying for comfort but none has been given. What to do oh what to do. I love my sisters so much and would do nothing to hurt them. All this because of alcohol that I would not drink. Should I have gone anyway and take a chance on backsliding or just abstain and have my family mad at me.
You probably should have gone and then left early to avoid the alcohol. I'd send a card or letter of apology and, if you can afford it, treat her to lunch or dinner as a way to make it up to her. It often doesn't take much to drive a wedge between siblings, but, it also often doesn't take much to repair the damage.
Your sister loves you - call and tell her (leave a message if necessary) how sorry you were to have missed all the fun, but you hope she understands how you are unable to handle even being around alcohol. Say again that you love her and hope to see her soon.
You have a hard path to travel, but Gold holds you in His hands.
Diane and I are like peas and carrots, according to Forest Gump. She told everything is okay and not to worry. She is an awesome sister.
Finally got the new internet going, but still having problems with it, so don't know how long it will allow me to stay on here.
Missed all of you and your comments.
God bless you. Hugs.
a good puzzle today
Glad to see you back.